Monday, May 11, 2009


Oh. Em. Gee.


I thought I hadn't blogged for about two weeks and just suddenly noticed that as of tomorrow it'll have been a month.

I believe it was Lee Ann's husband who said that if you don't post for a month, your blog is officially over. Or maybe it was for two months.

Clealy*, sir, I am sneaking this one in just under the wire.

Anyhow, it's been a long and involved month (the same can be said of the last year, really) however reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated (and perhaps celebrated a little too gleefully by some. Names have been taken.)

There are many reasons for my prolonged absence (and erratic posts) but I'm sure most of you don't come here for excuses and whining (although there has been a plethora of both over the past, difficult, year), therefore we shall dispense with all of that and just move on to more pressing issue of what I've been up to over the past, like, three or four months since I've actually written a "real" post.

Things I Have Learned

a) "Slumdog Millionaire" and "Hotel for Dogs" are NOT the same movie. If you get them mixed up and express shock at the latter winning the awards given to the former, you will be laughed at and perhaps taunted.

b) when knitting anything but warshcloths, gauge actually does matter and if you ignore it you will end up with some very nasty objects, none of which you should preserve for posterity. (hint: you should not be able to fit both feet into one sock)

c) fibre people are amazing (no, not Euell Gibbons and others of that ilk who run about eating bark mulch, I mean you, the knitters and spinners and occasionally even the crocheters) and should one start to fall on one's ass, there will inevitably be someone there to pick one up. And then to kick one in that self-same ass should it be so required.

Things I Have Knat

a) Warshcloths. Fourteen of them I believe.

ii) A scarf for my boyfriend-in-law.** It's a gorgeous blue alpaca/silk and I have a picture of it somewhere but I'm posting this from work so y'all are going to have to wait. It was supposed to be for Christmas but I think he got it half-way through January.

#) Seven or eight mitered squares for a blanket for myself. I don't believe I'll ever finish this but one can dream.

ping!) most of a sock for my daughter. This will eventually reside with the one sock I finished for myself, the sock and a half I've done for Sandra, the sock cuff I've done for my brother and the one and a half Seabury socks that I did for my mother. Either that or I'll just suck it up and maybe finish some socks. I should probably learn how as I'm soon going to be hanging out with a lot of people who know how to make socks (this is the literary device known as foreshadowing)

Everyday Things Other People Can Manage But Which Defeat Me Quite Often

7) Pajamas. I have lost my pajamas, completely and utterly, at least twice within this past month. If I didn't know for sure that several people had actually SEEN me in pajamas I might suspect that they were sort of like The Emperor's New Clothes and I didn't actually own any after all.

If in fact I don't own any and have been running about Seattle naked, would you be kind enough to let me know? I always prefer to be cognizant of whether I'm being laughed at or with.

(Actually it might be a bit of a relief if those bright pink fleece pajamas with the red and white reindeer all over them were imaginary, but I digress.)

42) Stairs. How on earth can y'all manage to go up and down stairs without incident on a more-or-less daily basis? You may recall a winter or two back when I bounced down the front stairs of the house, leaving a bruise in the shape of Japan on my ass. Well, I decided to celebrate Easter by bouncing down the stairs outside the kitchen door. Unfortunately there were no bloggable bruises, but as there are four entryways to my home, rest assured that there will be many more opportunities for a rousing game of "name that country" in the near future.

Places I Have Gone

Because of a "get into every place neat for free" pass thingie from Mr. Assmuppet's work, we have been to visit The Vancouver Police Museum, The UBC Museum of Anthropology, The Nitobe Memorial Garden and The Dr. Sun Yat-Sen Classical Chinese Garden, all of which were way cool. Mr. A and Her Surreal Highness have gone to a pile of other places but I've been working a lot of shifts (just finishing a run of 12 graveyards and I have another 9 days and 38 nights scheduled between now and September 12) so I haven't really been paying a lot of attention to anything.

When Joy comes to stay with me for a few days in June, perchance we shall have a chance to visit a few more places.

(I know! Joy! In my house! I could squee if I hadn't been working on repairing my spinning wheel with glue and pliers and wrenches yesterday and was feeling far too butch to do anything of the sort.)

The Pending Vending

It would seem that amidst my madness I've managed to do at least a little business and I shall be vending both at the Victoria Fibre Fest in June and at the Sock Summit in August (see back to that foreshadowy thingie a couple of paragraphs up).

The latter will be in conjunction with my partner in crime, Barb, from Wild Geese Fibres in Alberta. I've been working on a couple of exciting projects with a few folks -- more details as soon as they're available (or maybe you'll just have to show up and find out what's going on); I'll be vending some gorgeous little fibre art magnets made by the clever hands of my very good friend wenchlette and some moth-repellent sachets made by my friend Lavender who has a store here, but who seems to be temporarily closed. (I will update this link if she reopens in another location).

Speaking of stores, mine's been offline for many moons now due to a number of issues -- time, money, insanity and the difficulty of manipulating the piece-of-crap software I was using (the software was free -- one gets what one pays for, as always). I've decided to abandon the website (yes, I know, one can't abandon what one has neither owned nor maintained for many months - shut up) and go the Etsy route until I get my life a little more organized. I've had an Etsy thingie here for a while but I've never used it. Look for updates happening soon.

Um, and I think that's it. I hope that's it because likely half of you have fallen asleep by now.

I'll just go back to doing some paperwork here and maybe make another cup of coffee, seeing it doesn't seem that I'm going to be able to sleep again any time before November.

Carry on.

*not a typo, just a stupid joke known by like three people who read this blog so it was rude of me to include it but it amuses my tiny mind and it is still my blog so I'm leaving it. So there. Call the Ministry if you are so inclined.

**my brother's boyfriend. I didn't know what else to call him, so that works for me.

Welcome back!! Your snarky sarcasm has been sorely missed! Please feel free to make more frequent appearances!
Nice to see you back! You've been missed. Anyone who can make me laugh on a Monday morning before my 2nd cup of coffee is ok by me.
I hope you have better luck over at Etsy than you did with the free shop software. I'm glad to see that you aren't dead. Come swear at me sometime when you're free.. you know where to find me.
You're going to sock summit! Yippee!! Prepare to be invaded (which, in my case, will probably take the form of a shy little cough in the corner, followed by prompt embarrassed retreat). I'm going, too -- can be found at the knitspot/briar rose booth. I can't wait!
It's good to see you posting. I get around my postessness (I swear it should be a word) by making my tweets come up on the sidebar of my blog. I think of them as my faux posts.
Clealy you've been working your tail off. (What? that's how I pronounce it.) Wish I could go to Sock Summit but I have a prior commitment. Good luck with Etsy; it seems to be popular and from the experience of others, much safer from the vagaries of corporate mindscrew than a website.
You're alive! And blogging! That makes me happy.
doh! Sock Summit? Woot! Hope we get a chance to act goofy together for a few minutes cuz I'm going, too!
Yay!! You're back! Wish I were going to sock summit. If I were, I'd buy you a beer or several. Sounds like you need them.
Wonderful that you are back! Huzzah that you will be at the Sock Summit. I am a total wanker in that I only buy internet after I see/touch/fondle in person. This will be my chance for your great-looking fibres.
SO happy to see you again - but then you ARE worth waiting for. Glad all is going better for you - well except for the falling down the stairs thing. You are a welcome presence in my life.
Hurray!!! It's Rabbitch! Good to read you again Glad to see you"re going to Sock Summit. I considered it, but decided going clear across the continent would probably push me over the edge. Since I'd like last year's stroke (really) to be the only one, I opted for sanity and will focus on Rhinebeck, which is nearby.
Take some time to enjoy the spring and summer- and keep blogging!
I just sprayed my computer keyboard with coffee while reading this post - you just crack me up. Really glad you are back writing.
Hey chickie. BFIL works for me.

I'll be at SS helping out StitchJones and stalking teachers. Come over for a cuppa organic bleach.
I greet your return with great glee...I have missed your Rab-bitchy-ness. (Or is that Rabb-itchy-ness?) Don't fall down anymore steps...I think you've perfected the technique and can move on to something else. Something less ecchymotic is recommended. Oh, and I thought "boyfriend-in-law" was a nifty new way to refer to a man you're married to. I was going to use it that way. Disappointed to learn that's NOT what it means, and if my mother ever finds a boyfriend I will not call him that. (She'd cuff me if I did, anyway.)
been missing you, rabbitch -- glad you've surfaced at last.

boyfriend-in-law will do quite nicely unless/until you can more properly say "my brother's husband."

and besides, the title doesn't matter nearly so much as the affection involved.

having broken my tailbone on museum stairs, i am well aware that they can't really put your ass in a sling. and having also done an ass-over-teakettle fall down a flight of stairs that included two right-angle turns, tearing knee ligaments on the way down, let me offer my sincere sympathies to your wounded posterior.
Let's see, I have only blogged once in the entire 2008 and I am now trying to get back on track.

I suspect no one's really reading though so it's self-gratification and bad karma for me now?! :)
Welcome back, dear Rabbitch! I was just thinking yesterday (yes, I think now and then. Shut up.) about leaving a comment on your last (ancient) post about "when you comin' back?" and LO, you're back.

I am SO looking forward to your Etsy shop. Even though I have not yet knat up all the fibery goodness which is Rabbitworks yarn, I need, nay, MUST HAVE more.

Sure wish I could go to Sock Summit and treat you to a beer or five. Hope you have a wonderful and productive time!

Again, welcome back! I missed the heck out of ya!
'Clealy, sir' still works for me.
Glad you're with Etsy! I was a little worried that you'd given up or something when the shop went down. Shoulda known better...
RE: the **: we've always leaned towards the other version....

I was a daughter-outlaw for many years, and one of the conditions of marrying the guy was retention of said -outlaw status. Since his parents and family are excessiely cool, they agreed and we got hitched.
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