Wednesday, July 30, 2008


I Am Scrod

Apparently the new Vogue Knitting has come out and I'm mentioned in it in Lee Ann's column (Made in Canada).

Yes, this is what I wanted but I thought it was coming out 2-3 weeks from now and I'm completely unprepared.

If you hear screaming, it's just me.

Store will be updated tomorrow and if anyone's been waiting for emails from me, I'll try to do that tomorrow too.

In between the screaming.


note to self: be careful what you wish for ... you might get it.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008


Dear Gravy-Sucking Pigs

Now, as you all know, there are many gravy-sucking pigs out there and if you're one of them then I apologize, as I am not addressing all of you.

Rest assured I shall get to everyone in the fullness of time, however today I am addressing a particular group of gravy-sucking pigs. Namely, those who write in books taken out from the public library.

You are not book editors. No, you are not. You are nasty little people who are writing in books that do not belong to you. Were you book editors you would be paid for this rather than spending your spare time defacing public property.

These books do not belong solely to you. I have no objection to you writing in books that you have purchased and keep in your personal library, however these books belong to the public. As I am part of the public, they belong to me as well as to you and I am asking you to immediately stop with your asinine and offensive behaviour. Behavior. That thing.

Stop. Right now.

Your "corrections" are often wrong, your comments frequently puerile and your marking-up of books that I am reading takes my attention away from the story, in which I am often immersed to the point that I don't notice the world around me.

In short, you insert your unpleasant personalities and your often-illiterate commentary into my personal escape pod and I will tolerate it no longer.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Floggings will commence at dawn.

Sunday, July 13, 2008


Nibbled to Death by Dykes*

It's far more fun than being nibbled to death by ducks, let me tell you.

I'm back home after my weekend in Seattle. This weekend was just what I needed, and my family was so pleased and relieved that I actually returned that it seems to have set a fire under their asses. I have a new computer to set up as soon as I get the table in place -- Ben worked on it all weekend -- and there's much clearing and hauling of fibre and other things to be done.

Ryan is fine. Well, she's not fine but she's far finer than I expected, and she will be fine. Repairs are well under way.

And now to clean out an entire 10x11 room full of fibre. Apparently my daughter needs a new bedroom. I'll attempt a real post soon.

*(I told them I was going to trash all three of their reputations with one sentence -- did it work? I must clarify that most of the nibbling was done by E and L's new knitten, who repeatedly stuck his tongue up my nose. Oh yes, and their hamster hates me -- possibly because a) he's not a hamster, he's a hedgehog and b) I dumped water on his head.)

Friday, July 11, 2008


Nibbled to Death by Ducks

I was reading a book once (yes, I read, shut up), I don't remember which one, and some dude had died (that really narrows it down for you, doesn't it?). I don't remember what was listed as the official cause of death -- syphillis, a broken heart, alien mind rays (the three are very easy to mix up) but someone said "I don't care if the death certificate says that he was nibbled to death by ducks, I know he died of (insert something else here)."

Anyhow, that explains the title. The phrase tickled my funnybone, and I've ever since wanted to have that listed as my official cause of death.

We shall not, however, be needing a death certificate this week. I'm busy but not deceased. Nobody in my family is ill, and my mother is on the mend. Enough so that she and dad are watching Her Surreal Highness this weekend while I tootle off to see some friends in Seattle, including Ryan, who very nearly was nibbled to death by ducks, or its equivalent, quite recently and who needs my love and support. Or at least that's what I'm using as my excuse for slacking off for three days.

I'm sorry I worried people -- I hadn't realized it had been more than two weeks since I blogged.

The writing mojo left. It was the last thing to go. The reading blogs went, the knitting went, the dyeing went and then the writing went. I've had a difficult time of late.

The knitting has re-commenced and I've been dyeing again. The blogs? Um, I think I have several thousand posts to catch up on. Please excuse if you start getting comments from April's posts.

Oh, and I'm writing again. See? Here I am.

Thank you all for caring. And now I'm off to Seattle for some serious slackage. I might have to buy yarn and roving, too while I'm there. You know, seeing I'm running out.

Shut up.

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