Wednesday, May 28, 2008


What Things Really Cost

A box of green garbage bags -- $2.79
The value of my time spent cleaning up the house -- about $40
Finding an old boyfriend running the drop-scale at the local dump? Priceless.

Apparently I am a small person with a shrivelled grape for a heart. Black grape. I was pleased.

Ha! That is always fun. liek the time I found my sister's ex doing delivery runs for the local pharmacy.
My personal best was this time that the PrettyGirl from high school -- you know the one, totally vapid, completely adorable, pretty face, pretty chest, pretty ass, all the boys loved her, all the girls loved her, but she was the meanest, most evil creature on the planet? -- bumped into me at my job; she wasn't working, she was staying home with her twenty-seven children (one could suggest that I exaggerate slightly), all from different fathers, and her ass was seriously this big.

Hey, screw you! I've got an ex-wife and five kids to support. The pay may not be great but the work is regular! Plus I find some really neat stuff.
The same Prettygirl from my high school had to take my orderr at a burger joint!!!!! LOL. She had such BIG plans, wonder what happened?............
The Pretty Girl from my high school dishes up macaroni salad at the local Fred Meyer's deli counter where her boss is mean to her.

I'd like to have pity, but I'm too busy Not Being There and Living My Life to really get involved in community projects like that. I mean, sure, I can volunteer to help build a house. But fixing that trainwreck? Oh honey, optimism is not your colour.
i'm still loving the time Miss Hot Shit from my high school checked into the Best Western i clerked with a guy old enough to be her dad. she might could have pulled it off if she hadn't turned purple when she saw me smirking. . . ah well of those golden moments. Life is sweet. And karma is a marvelous thing.
That's awesome! I guess my heart is a shriveled up grape, too, because that would really have made my day. Hell, it would have made my week!
Spewing coffee over everything.

You've mad my shriveled little heart glow just a bit.
I guess I'm a black hearted bitch as well, because that totally would have made my day!
Like the time I ran into a ex - bussing tables at the restaurant he told everyone he owned. He didn't - he actually WAS the busboy...
So... wait a minute... by my calculation (counts on fingers) you spent a whole 20 MINUTES cleaning your house?

Wow. I don't think I could stand it for that long.
Count me in shriveled black heart club too, because just last week, I found out that the boy I dated throughout most of high school is married to a woman who looks just like his mother. About 5 ft tall and 250+ pounds. Yes, I am completely snarky.
Love it. Absolutely love it.
I'm such a dork. I thought you were glad because he gave you a deal on dumping your trash.
mmmmmmm - black grape. Is that going to be your next colorway cause I'm thinking it could be a really awesome one. that most of us would relate to and love!
How about meeting the guy I had a crush on for my entire high school life, during which he never paid attention to me, back in the pathetic small town we grew up in and going bald!! Ha, I can't help but like that!
Our high school pretty girl now does pedicures at one of the local salons. My husband bought me a very expensive gift card that I am using up $25 a pedicure - and I am making my toenails get really gross and nasty, then I call and specifically ask for an appointment with Ms. High School Pretty Girl. That, to me, is priceless.
Oh, that is indeed priceless.

And your heart isn't black! Nawwwwwww, you were just SO HAPPY to find that he had STABLE EMPLOYMENT, right? 8^D
LOL! Ah, darlin, we are in good company. What a pleasant look back to the time I discovered my extremely bright and geeky ex working at a local coffee shop. Way to move up in the world, dude.

Move over, black grape.
This is one of those stories you hear about, but you never think you'll know someone who has actually experienced it. Fabulous!!!!!!!!
revenge is living well enough that you can lend x and present wife enough money that they don't get foreclosed on.
Join the rest of us raisins hearted evil folk just feels SOOOOOO good! :-)
Like the commercials say, "Priceless"!!! That would make my millenium!
FANtastic! Except your time is worth more than $40.

My first great love Freshman year of college (his senior year) lives just a few blocks from me now. I wonder if/when I'll run into him.

charlizeen on yahoooooo
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