Monday, January 21, 2008


Hey, Hey, It's That Day

Yes, dear readers, it is officially my natal day.

I am old. Please treat me with the respect that is my due.

I would have posted earlier today but I had a total meltdown this weekend and as a result was sort of busy for most of the day today, trying to catch up with all of the things I should have done yesterday.

The arrival of the Rabbitchly birthday isn't usually a time of great trauma for me because really, I don't give a fuck what I look like 90% of the time (you! you in the back! the one waving a beer and yelling 'and it shows!' ... shut up!) but this year I decided to get Ben to take a picture of me on Saturday so I could show y'all the wonderful neck warmer that Ann made for me. Well, I guess I shouldn't be surprised that after 3.5 hours of sleep, on my first day off since Christmas I might look a little ragged around the edges but dudes -- I was old. Fat and jowly, too.

I mean serious cheek-jowly things going on. I looked like I had a baby's bum stuck on the side of my face or perhaps had grown a new set of very tired, very old breasts. On my face.

These things could have qualified for their own postal code; small nations could have sheltered thereunder.

Naturally I did what any right-thinking rabbit would do. I burst into tears and was completely useless for an hour.

Eventually Ben convinced me that in fact I didn't have something bizarre going on with my face but by that time I was trashed for the rest of the day. I was too awake to sleep and too asleep to do anything at all. The entire day was flushed.

note: those who have met me in person will attest that I am neither old nor jowly and most definitely do not have an extra set of worn-out breasticles growing offa my face. none of their assurances would have helped whatsoever during this long-overdue meltdown.

I was later treated to an excellent home-cooked dinner with dead cows and vegetables and wine and so forth and then we all sat around and watched Stardust (excellent movie, btw). And then I went to bed. And stayed there for almost 24 hours, missing my knitting group, standing up a friend, and basically being non-functional until 2:30 or so this morning.


I don't think we'll be doing that working around the clock thing any more.

I think I'll take another run at the birthday thing 'round about this time again next year. Maybe I'll get it right that time.

note: there will be pictures of the neck warmer and the matching hat and some other birthday loot later this week, but I'm posting from work so i can actually get this in before midnight and i don't have any of the pictures here.

I wonder if your breast chins are covered by the Monroe Doctrine?

I just called you an old hoar in the "12 things I have to knit or my tits will fall off " group. Is that what you mean by respect? Because lady, I got that in spades.

Sorry to hear about your meltdown missus, hopefully some sleep managed to get things right again.

Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday, Rabbitch! Here's to many more (now with fewer meltdowns).
Happy Birthday, and may it be the start of a great year! Now, next time you get a picture taken, just make sure you only look at it when you're drunk. Somehow I can't imagine you being a maudlin drunk. That should take care of any perception problems.

Meanwhile, the sleep thing sounds like it was a damned good idea.

And if you ever start worrying about bizarre face-things going on again, we can compare pix. I'll match my multiple chin and jowls with yours any day. You'll lose. Mine started when I was in my 20's, so I've gotcha beat there, too!
*H*A*P*P*Y* *B*I*R*T*H*D*A*Y* !

I always look particularly bad in the morning, before my chins and jowls have gathered themselves up to face the day.
I do think you need to schedule in more than 5 mins sleep a day. Just saying !
Look at the bright side: Most of us of a certain age are complaining that our breasts are down around our waists. At least yours are high and perky. ///running away...but not before I shout: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!
Hoppy Boofday Bunnie! (I loved Stardust.. great movie)
Jowls are in though. At least if you're playing Pass the Pigs. And you're leaning on them. >.>

Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday Sweet Cheeks!
Happy Birthday!
happy birthday!

yeah, I looked at myself over the weekend and realized I am getting the turkey wattles too. but then I just figured "fuck it, it's me".

besides, my health insurance (such as it is) doesn't cover cosmetic surgery.
Happy Birthday!!!
Hoppy Birthday, a day late...I like to think of it as spreading out the good wishes a little longer!

I will personally attest that there are no baby bums or other strange extras on your face.

After I got my hair chopped off, I had several students ask me if I'd changed my hair colour...Well, no, it's just that all the grey shows up better. I don't mind, I kind of like it (to the distress of my hairdresser!) Though I will admit it's disconcerting to look in the mirror and suddenly, very clearly, see my mother looking back at me!

(Then again, I suppose I'm only just noticing what other people see all the time. That might explain why, when I'm back for a visit, someone sees me in the grocery store and asks me how the grandkids are doing. Fortunately, Ma looks pretty youthful for her age, so I don't have to take it too personally!)
Happy Birthday (a day late and a dollar short, but a happy one anyway!)
Happy happy birthday to you!
Happy Birthday!! (better late than never)
Happy Birthday!

There is nothing wrong with a birthday meltdown every once in a while. It's good for us capi girls. Plus it keeps the men in line. ;^)
Happy Birthday!
I was going to try for something witty, but Norma's comment still has me chuckling and the whole image you presented in this post just melted my brain. (Though I did encounter a porn flick called Edward Penishands - shall we set one up called Titface?)
Happy Birthday anyway. I always feel like pretty hot stuff until I actaully see the pictures...better not to look, I think. The Evil Genie of the Camera steals our good looks.
Off to have a bday drink in your honor!

Or maybe I should wait till noon. Damn.

Happiest year yet, baby.
You've earned the meltdown, had it coming for a while, so now it's history. I felt bad when I'd look in the mirror and see my mother. Now I see my grandmother (and she had a good 50 lbs on me!) and it's really scary.
Birthdays? Hey, have a good year. That's what counts, right?
OK, the breasticles thing made me laugh out loud. It's good to know that there's a name for them! But since you don't have any, we won't be needing that name, eh?

Happy birthday!
Since your birthday's 8 days before mine, you're automatically older, right? Not that I'd celebrate your mourning that you're old and fat. But I'm a bitch. You knew that.

I'm thinking of giving my birthday a pass this year. Seems like 45 is a much bigger deal, even though the fucker's going to be on a Thursday. What a useless day!

Oh, Happy Birthday, by the way. Bitch.
Bloglines sort of screwed me out of wishing you a Happy Breasticle-Free Birthday on the right day...but the sentiment is there! Even if it is a day late. Happy Day After Your Birthday! May the rest of the year bring nothing but flattering photos and warm feelings.
Thanks to my stupid computer being a piece 'o' crap, I done missed your birfday. And I was wondering where my saggy boobs had wandered off to. Can you tell them to meander back home when they are done corrupting your face? Thank you.
Happy belated birthday! When I had my ID photo taken for my new job, I looked at it and thought "Who's that depressingly middle-aged woman on my ID?" I made sure to work harder on looking good for my new drivers license pic!
better late than never, I hope. Happy (super belated) birthday! XO
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