Sunday, September 23, 2007

 

The Joys of Pub(l)ic Speaking


Well, I'm certainly no Yarn Harlot, however it appears that I shall be making a small foray into the world of public speaking shortly.

And frankly I'm in a bit of a tizzy.

I've done a certain amount of public speaking before and really I'm not so good at it. I've only done it out of necessity on behalf of the charity I used to work for and most of my stuff consisted of "mumble mumble, thank you, mumble great contribution" and then I ran away.

Apparently, though, that won't do this time.

You see, my brother knits, a little bit. He joined a group, went a few times, knat part of a washcloth and some sort of obscene phallic barbie dress that he uses as a bookmark. He's been unable to go for a few months now, but a couple of weeks back he ran into the group's faciliator and they were talking a bit and he mentioned that he had this sister. This sister who dyes wool and also spins.

This sister who happens to be me.

The facilitator said "Oh! How neat, would she come and speak to us about it?" And so The Brother said he'd ask me and he did and as per usual I was drunk and said yes.

And so now as we work out the logistics of this, the dear facilitator man doesn't seem to understand that I spin like a weasel on crack, and that my forté is dyeing.

My spinning sucks ass. Badly.

And yet somehow I seem to have agreed to go and talk to this group about spinning.

Fortunately I'm also going to be talking to them about processing fibre, which I know a little bit about and have done a lot of, and will take several examples of unwashed "stuff" (some llama, some cheviot, some of Tink's fleece) and then some samples of cleaned fibre and then samples of what it looks like carded.

I'll also haul in one of my wheels and the drum carder and hand-cards and some samples of fibre from people who really know what they're doing and we'll all just go mental and spin stuff for a while and maybe even blend things on the drum.

And then I'll do a segment on dyeing and the pros and cons of natural dyeing, acid dyeing and overdyeing and send everyone home with a present.

The group is going to be max ten people. I think I can handle ten people, don't you?

I'm going to wear Depends, though, just in case.

Comments:
And mayhap get likkered up beforehand?
 
Be sure to take pictures!
 
You'll do great -- think of it as sharing what you know, not as speaking. (And, yeah, have a drink beforehand.)
 
Yes, definitely. You must be schnockered (never tried to spell that word before). Just don't barf.
 
Depends and Valium ought to do it. You'll be great!
 
Good luck Rabbitch.. we'll be crossing our fingers and praying to FSM that you don't say anything like "assferret" during your talk.
 
I vote you just plan to say "assferret" in the first five minutes. Get it over with, and anything after that will be excellent, right? Depends is an very cool idea, though -- I may try that myself sometime. (Seriously, you'll do great.)
 
It's been my experience that non-spinners are pretty much fascinated by those who whirl the wool no matter what the skill level. I think you'll do just great. But it couldn't hurt to have a couple of drinks beforehand just for medicinal purposes...
 
If you have a drink (or two-ish) beforehand, it has two benefits: the obvious one is that it calms the nerves. The second is that you really don't give a flying poop if you make an arse of yourself anyway.
 
I'm sure if you tell them you spin like a weasel on crack they'll find it very entertaining. What's the problem?
 
Sounds like a snap to me. Ten people who want to hear what you know - which is more than they know I presume. Spend enough time on the fiber preparation and dying and you might not even have time for spinning anyway. You have me laughing and learning every time I read your posts.
 
Wait a minute, wait a minute, where's the Rabbitch who has a way with words? If you don't want to "speak" then write it down and "read."

I'm with Judi - they want to learn. You will have fun, they will have fun, and they will beg you to come back. Make them take you for a drink after.
 
Hi!

I know you probably don't know me, but I read your blog every time you post and really enjoy it. I wanted to let you know that I've nominated you for the Rockin' Girl Blogger Award. You can steal the button off my site.

Congratulations!
 
i've heard of talking out your ass, but that's ridiculous!
 
they don't know shit from shineola anyway, so whatever you do will be "expert" to them--

And you so ARE a Rockin' Girl Blogger--welcome to the club
 
Too cool! The worst that can happen is that they don't ask you to speak again. And that you're too drunk to care.

Did I tell you about the two garbage bags of fleece in my basement, given to me on Freecycle? Hoping to do some scourin' tonight!
 
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