Sunday, June 03, 2007

 

Signifying Nothing


I gots nothing for you today. Nada.

(you! in the back! the one waving a beer about and chortling! if you yell "try to keep it under 10,000 words, then" once more i'm going to come over there and knit you a Chicken Hat.)

So today, seeing I'm all out of sound and fury, we are going to have a link-heavy post, and discuss knitting. Yes, knitting. On a knitting blog.

Don't faint, you'll fall over and hurt yourselves. Both of you. And I'd hate to have that on my conscience.

As a continuing feature of this blog, I am going to indulge in a little annoying knit-oriented do-goodery. This is being done mostly because I am too drunk to knit socks and I haven't done a thing on Kiri since I didn't photograph my ass last week.

1. Dorothy is more than half-way to her goal of raising $2,000 for cancer research.

As an aside, if she reaches her goal, her husband is going to make a public apology for laughing at her. It is my private dream that he shall do so wearing Birkenstocks and her wedding dress but I don't think that's particularly likely.

She has prizes coming out the ying-yang (which probably explains why she walks like that), said prizes including some yarn from yours truly as well as an absolute assload of sock yarn and all sorts of other delicious goodies. So iffen y'all have a dollar or three to spare (CANADIAN dollar, even, which is like four cents USD) then hop on over and help a good cause and keep my dream of Mr. Dorothy in a wedding dress alive!

(and with dreams like that, is it any wonder i wake up screaming?)

2. The deadline for mailing your stuff for Dulaan is fast approaching, so get those needles flying. If you're in the Vancouver area and would like to knit for this amazing project but don't have the yarn or the loot to purchase any, drop me a line at bunniegirl at shaw dot ca. I'm betting I could shake some loose.

Team Vancouver is doing well. Wenchlette has contributed five hats (some made from yarn that I dyed with my own little paws) and Tammy had her a blog contest going on for a while (all gone now, alas). I don't know how many items she raised/initiated/inspired but we've been doing pretty well. I was intending to make 20 just to show MaryB that I could but I seem to be only at 8 now (I thought it was ten but I clearly can't count) so I doubt that's going to happen. Ten is doable, though, and ten I will do.

A couple of the skeins of wool that I put in the window over at Birkeland got all faded from the sun, so I took them out of the store and I'm going to use them to make some hats and mittens.

If you need some inspiration (as if all of those little kids' faces isn't inspiration enough), take a peek at what happened at Ryan's Dulaan-A-Thaan last night. She and TMK and about 20 of their closest friends sat and knat and drank tea and ate lots of good-looking stuff for eleven hours, and got 100 more items ready to ship out.

I don't think she's going to have any trouble meeting her "10,000 or Bust" item quota for the year. I'm still betting we're going to be approaching 20,000 when all is said and done.

please note they are in real need of adult items this year. seems we managed to clothe all of the kids in MongofreakinLEEah. you're all fantastic and deserve a round of applause. that being said, if you've made a baby/kid item, SEND IT. they're having more babies over there every day; nothing will go to waste.

r. Someone asked a few days ago about an easy mitten pattern for Ann's drive for mittens for the Cheyenne River Reservation.

Since she started keeping track (almost three years ago) she and her group (and you) have sent over 1,000 pairs of mittnz to the program. Anyone think we could maybe do 1,000 in one year? Anyone? Bueller?

i have no idea what that bueller thing is about but all the big kids say it so i thought i'd try it out. it doesn't seem to have helped my understanding in any way

I have managed to gather (entirely through the work of others, I might add) three easy patterns: Boat Oar Mittens, which I am going to make with my faded bulky yarn (and may well grab some out of stock also, seeing I can get lots more of this wool, and dyeing it is such a hoot). Another easy pattern for worsted-weight yarn is Sideways Mittens, and Jean has shared her "No Swatch/No Gauge" mitten pattern with Ann, so I swiped the link just to make it look like I'm doing something.

+/-. As I have noted before, Ann is clearly some sort of annoying do-gooding strumpet, possibly almost on the scale of Norma. I think between the two of them and Ryan, our reputation for being evil and fearsome is in danger of being toppled. Fortunately there is me to balance the whole thing out.

I knew I'd find my purpose in life one day.

Anyhow, Ann has also brought to my (and possibly your) attention that there is a guild gathering cotton washcloths in Victoria, BC. These are destined to be donated to newly-trained midwives in the Philippines. Apparently they get something like five days of training, and then they are each presented with one of these coveted cloths, for the purpose of washing off Mom and Baby. Five days of training. One washcloth. Dude, that's all just scary.

Then again women have been having babies all alone for billyuns of years (or many thousands, anyhow), and I suppose that five days of training is a heck of a lot better than none. Ditto the washcloth.

Seeing I knit washcloths compulsively when stressed, anyhow, and seeing I've been a little stressed of late, I've finished a couple and will be sending them off shortly. Please contact either me or Ann for further info if you have a couple you'd like to donate to the cause.

é. And speaking of washcloths, I gathered a ton of them (many thanks to my stalker Marie -- are you still reading? I haven't heard from you in ages) and donated them to one of the local transitional housing/shelter places last year (or was it the year before? As Kermit says, time's fun when you're having flies). They gave them out in their Christmas packages, for use either in bathing or in the kitchens. The shelters that house women are especially grateful for these, as many of the women ask for washcloths for their showers and the shelters just can't stretch their budgets to buy any.

Once I finally post the totals and the names of the final four or five prize winners for the Hat Thingie I was doing (yes, I know my self-imposed deadline was the middle of March. It's not March yet, shut up) I'm going to start up another drive for washcloths, with a goal of something like 100 for the end of November so that I can get them to the shelters in time.

I'm figuring that if work (and/or the lack of work in Mr. Bunnie's case) continues to be such a clusterfuck, I can do that many all by myself.

I was going to conclude this by addressing all of the comments I haven't answered over the last couple of months, but I'm pretty sure I'm close to my 10,000-word limit, so I'll end here.

I promise to get all pissy about something some time soon. Like maybe that weird man at the bus stop today, who actually went home proudly wearing his "xxxxxx Foods, Trainee" badge, with his name on it. And his apron that he wore at work. And who was silently singing show tunes and making odd hand gestures at the bus stop.

I think he maybe thought he was one of the Supremes or something, but it was decidedly creepy.

And I think if something creeps me out, there's a good chance that it was all wrong on at least four different levels.

Off to adjust my halo and maybe starch my habit or something.

Later, gators.

Comments:
I'm so glad you found your purpose in life. Most people wander around all their lives, never finding it. :D
 
if this helps... the bueller thing is from the movie "ferris bueller's day off". one of those '80s movies the kids used to love.
 
Wow, is that the longest post you've ever done, Rabbitch? ... well I'm heading over to Dorothy's to see if I can promote Mr. into wearing the wedding dress you speak of [with or without Birkenstocks] by donating again.
 
Thanks for the mittens links...I have a couple of washcloths...send them to you? or ? for the midwife thing...will also knit up a couple or so more I'll send to you for the shelters.
note: I've been knitting them with a 33 stitch count, they're measuring 6"x5.5"...which I find to be a good size, do you want them larger?
 
Thanks for the mittens link honeybun. I also have a pound of pink cotton - now it has a purpose. You're the best!

Really, I mean that.
 
You're right, one hour of training and one washcloth IS scary!

I have some Fantasy Naturalle here that would just LOVE to become a washcloth if you decide we can help make some ...
 
::rather dazedly:: I do like how you write about nuthin'! [g]

(See? Did I say anything about under 10,000 words? No, I did not. Because I've done the same thing myself, and I know how it is. So not a peep. [edible or otherwise.] Not a syllable. Not-- Wups. Um, you aren't gonna be in the vicinity of Portland anytime soon, are you? The one south of you, that is. 'Cause I wanna make sure I don't have to start running for the hills. I'd look awful in a Chicken Hat.)
 
Well, seeing as I used to be one of those horrible, skrawny size 2's, the Mr. couldn't fit into my wedding dress even if I greased him up. Too bad, with a floppy straw hat bedecked in huge flowers, that would have been pretty damn funny.

I'll be getting on those washcloths pretty soon and some mitts and a hat ...
 
So many needy. I keep trying to do my best. Bless those who do so much.
 
**thump** OMG I don't believe it. Knitting! Maisie, my smelling salts....

Dorothy there's always the Sally Ann. Or rent a dress. We'll get the mister in a wedding dress.
 
Sleepy now. All that reading made me tired....zzzzzz
 
Could have sworedificated that was you in the Capilano Walmart today.
Twasn't.
too bad, but then hey, thinking about there being two of you is kinda hot.
snicker.
 
So, when you say you've got "nuthin' ", what you really mean is, "get a cuppa coffee, first, hon, and put your feet up, I've a tale to tell you"? Never mind, you were the ONLY lifeforce on my interwebs for days. I had to go read a book, for cyrin' out loud.
 
Wha? You've never seen Ferris Bueller's Day Off? Mister Yarns and I have seen that that a billion times. Fuuuuunn-neeeee!

What a lot of do-gooderism. Makes me want to cut my wrists. (guilt..or is that quilt?)

And, um, US dollar sucks these days. Canada is almost at par. I might have to raise my prices. (eek)
 
I'm a compulsive washcloth knitter and I learned about your drive from Marianne. If you'll give me an address, it'd be my pleasure to send some cloths.
 
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