Saturday, June 17, 2006

 

Goat Scrotum Redux


Suppose I should clarify:

a) No, nobody was asking me to clean the microwave or even hinting at it. It was a sharing, pure and simple. Well, goat scrotae are never simple, but you know what I mean.

b) There is no janitor, or not so you'd notice. It is the job of the people who use the microwave to clean it. (And any adult who expects a janitor or anyone else to clean their microwave either better start paying that janitor themselves, or grow right the fuck up.)

c) There is no visible dirt in the microwave. Damned near spotless, in fact. Just a very strong odor of ... goat.

d) If you are missing a goat, please call me.

Comments:
I could lend you my temp. But I want him back!
 
I recently was reading a chem student's blog entry about the molecules that make up goat odor...

http://blog.tenderbutton.com/?p=108
 
Both goat scrotum tapenade and vole wang brulee are often mistaken for muskrat sphincter crudite. I recommend putting a large metal bowl filled with aluminum foil balls inside the microwave and setting it to "high" for about 22-41 minutes to get rid of the smell. This is extremely dangerous and probably deadly but once it might not be worse than that gag feeling you get from breathing every time someone heats up their pop tart. I wonder what muskrat sphincter pop tarts taste like.
 
I hope you'll share if you discover you're getting hits to your blog from a "goat scrotum" Google search...
 
Take a glass measuring cup and boil water with baking soda in for awhile in it...another thing is cat litter....put a bowl of cat litter in there for a couple days....or crumple up newpaper and put it in over night....
The smell is probably from burned popcorn...my son did that once... aaack!!! I almost put the microwave outside for the garbage after it stinking for a week.
 
You've dodged a bullet.

People joke about being butted by a goat. Those people have never been butted by a goat.

And they'll do it at the drop of a hat. Plus....they can strike within their body length x3.

They come up slowly, rear up a bit, then BOOOWIE! They burst forth, slamming your closest boney outcroping with their thick forehead where the horns meet the skull.

Some folks think they gore you with the horns. I almost wish they did.

And carney folks put them in petting zoos. I just don't get it. A goat could kill a small child.

Don't kid around with goats.

Get it? That's my little joke.

Stop laughing. It's not funny.

New Episode...0006 tonight!

-Biggs
 
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