Wednesday, February 22, 2006


Half Way There

And Livin' On a Prayer (with thanks to Bon Jovi).

The Bucket of Boiled Ass is now at row 74 out of 142. Therefore I'm officially half-way there, if we don't take into consideration the edging, which we are conveniently overlooking in a vain attempt to make us think we can still make it.

(And I don't know when the hell I became more than one person but that's beside the point. Shut up.)

I'm also conveniently ignoring the fact that each row is longer than the last.

Half way. Really.

No pictures today. I'm very tired and had a rough day at the doctor's yesterday. Seems I need to have surgery right freakin' now if I want to keep anything resembling boobage stuck to the front of my body. My "mouse" is big enough to be a rat. Or a badger.

Yes, it will now be referred to as The Breast Badger.

I've got some testing coming up next Thursday, then a consult with TWO surgeons because I'm so special (and need some major reconstruction) and then we'll set a surgery date as soon as possible.

Fortunately it will be happening after the end of the Olympics, so it won't interfere with my knitting time, which is a great relief. What is mere physical beauty (or even health) when compared with the urgency of bringing home the gold for Canada's Drunken Lace Knitting Team?

I know y'all are just dying for some boob pictures (and are my stats going to jump when the pervs all start googling for that, or what?) but I'm afraid I'm going to have to disappoint. I'm not particularly enamoured with the fact that I now need a separate postal code for The Badger and don't much feel like sharing with my nearest and dearest 400 friends.

Maybe some "after" pictures if you're all really good and eat all of your veggies. (I'll need a note from your mom.)

Yes, including the broccoli.

Ugh. Well, at least it'll be after the Knitting Olympics. (Skewed priorities? Who?)

I REALLY want to see what happens to your stats based on the term "Breast Badger." That's just terrifying...
If your breast badger sees it's shadow do you get 6 more weeks of knitting?

Hot-Bunnie-Mama, you're killing me. This can't be happening, not now and not to you.
Half way. Definitely half way. I am more than happy to share this delusion with you.

Good luck with your pest control. Keep us updated, okay? I have enough to worry about.
Good luck with the "breast badger" and sorry that you're going through this. I must say that you're killing me. I told my hubby about your references to the Bucket of Boiled Ass Lace and he laughed his ass off. He has also taken to referring to my Diamond Fantasy Shawl as, you guessed it, a Bucket of Boiled Ass Lace. Whatever turns him on I guess.
um, you already know I love broccoli, and since you proposed to me an all, I think I should get to see the handiwork firsthand, before anyone else. Well except for that silly man you live with. snort. Keep us posted - I'm glad this will be over for you sooner than later - I know how important it is to ya. Say, can we send you care packages? :-)
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