Tuesday, June 07, 2005

 

Homewrecker


It would seem that I'm a homewrecker.

The Weird French Canadian Boy next door and my friend broke up. He moved out. They were fighting all the time, and you know it was best for everyone, right?

Well, I found out tonight that I'm part of the cause.

She took care of my kid for a couple of hours while I moved stuff to the storage locker. I gave her a box of ice cream bars in thanks.

I gave her the ice cream bars, he looked at them and said "well, I'm glad she's able to satisfy your every need, seeing I obviously can't."

Um, wtf? I gave her ice cream in return for babysitting. It's not exactly strange, and it's certainly a few steps short of fornication.

I've never made a secret of the fact that I have an "interesting" past. I'm easy, or at least I was before my husband got me all married up and made me stop dating. I've slept with a whole bunch of boys (and several girls too but that's a topic for another post and oh my god I think I just came out but move along, it's not all that interesting).

But really. Ice cream? Frozen milk on a stick. That's hardly grounds for divorce.

Some people just need to have the extreme slappage applied upside their heads, methinks.

And in the meantime, I'm a homewrecker. And that home? I don't mind so much being part of the wrecking.

Comments:
I'm sorry - the thing you gave her that satisfies needs he can't is ICE CREAM? I love me some Ben & Jerry's but, really, it is just NOT the same.

All I can think is Wow, he must really be bad in bed. And know it.
 
I think in time (and probably not in too terribly much time at that) that friend is going to thank you for being a "homewrecker". Seriously that boy (and I do mean BOY) has him some issues.
 
I do believe that if all it took was ice cream, I would be way fatter than I am. I mean, it is alot easier to eat ice cream in public.
And if that is all it takes for her, he is really awful or she hasn't had the real thing to compare to.
:)
 
Wait! Ice Cream? Lets see...
Ice Cream, Sex, Ice Cream, Sex

No comment.
 
unbelievable! what brand of ice cream was it? maybe that made the difference.
 
well you know that in quebec giving the gift of ice cream is quebecois for "thanks for the fuck"
 
Obviously, he was looking for an excuse to leave if a little bitty ice cream bar set him off.

At least she can enjoy said ice cream bars in peace :)
 
Clealy, ma'am, are a fucking slut. And a selfish one at that, because you ain't sent ME no ice cream.

Hmmph.
 
Well! It's not like you volunteered your body as the instrument in which she could eat the ice cream off of...didya?

AND she doesn't have to share the ice cream now.

Personally I'm miffed because I'm allergic to ice cream. Who knew it was so satisfying?

(You know these kind of posts are a twofer. The post itself is entertaining....then one reads the comments and cracks up all over again! Thanks for the giggle.)
 
The question is - had they found a use for ice-cream other than eating it?
(My God - that would be SO cold!)
 
Wow, that ice cream thing triggered something in that household. All's I can say is poor, poor boy. He didn't get it right, and the way he's handled it, he may not get it right for long, long time. Or get IT for a long, long time.

Maybe he should go away and eat some ice cream.

All's I can say about your firend is, good thing you gave her some ice cream. She'd may not have been able to discover what a schmuck the guy she's living with is/was.
 
You can come "wreck" my home anytime. WaWa prefers ice cream SANDWICHES. So please come prepared (haha .. she said "come").
While you and the ice cream are pleasuring him, I will be out on the deck eating a massive bowl Everything But the Kitchen Sink + some Magic Shell topping. Let me know when you are done and I will come clean-up the wrappers....ice cream sandwich wrappers that is...
 
You can do that with ice cream.

Damn!
 
That breakup was just waiting to happen. You just happened to be in the right place at the right time with the right dessert.
 
It's probably some insider "dig" he was jabbing her with. Perhaps she said "You never bring me ice-cream anymore." or "Not now honey, my ice-cream will melt." and then the next thing you know, the bitchy rabbit lady shows up with the offending desert. I mean, it's obviously more than a frenchman can take!
 
Well, I'm pretty sure now I'll have to send the budgie away on vacation when you and your canadian ice cream bars come down for HarlotFest 2005! And unlike monsieur Bastarde, he'll go happily and not make a fuss.
gaile
fidgetybudgie
now who's a slut!?
 
am I to understand that I could have saved all the $$ I spent on sex toys last night and had some Hagen Daaz insteat??
 
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