Monday, October 11, 2004


Vintage Madness

Bowing to popular demand, and because I don't want to clean the bathroom, I have decided to post a selection of my vintage patterns. I have a billion, but here are a few.

First, P.K. Family Fahsions in Knitwear:

I can't even begin to tell you how urgently I wish these damned publishers had put DATES on their books. It's old, anyhow, and very entertaining. My personal favourite from this collection is none other than ...

Yes, it's Uncle Nimrod! This is described as a "General Utility Cardigan for Hours of Relaxation". I don't think that guy with the pipe looks like he's relaxed since the day he was born. Might be the poker up his ass. Ya think? I'm also a little concerned about the term "Utility". I mean, a utility chicken usually has either only one or sometimes as many as five legs ... does this sweater have three and a half sleeves or something?

I'm pretty sure I'm in love with this woman:

I don't know if it's the sweater, the raccoon eyes or the hair but this chickie is hot. I'm pretty sure it's the hair, however with that much spray in it, you couldn't take her camping for the weekend. One careless spark from the campfire and *woomf*, everything up in flames.

Hot date indeedie.

Last (for this post), but not least, we have these two babes:

These patterns came bundled with one I really wanted on eBay. I'm never going to have either a 37" or a 38" bust again, I don't think, so if any of you skinnychicks out there would like these, or if any of you have skinnychicks for whom you knit, let me know and they'll be in the mail posthaste.

W00! Now I'll get to know everyone's bust size as WELL as their addresses. My evil plan to take over the world (starting with everyone's boobs, it would seem) is well underway!


She is hot - if anything would ever send me to shop in the girl aisle, it would be a high maintenence brunette, but more importantly, I'm pretty sure Uncle Nimrod *is* my deceased grandfather. I swear to all the little gods - tatty cardigan, scowl, shape of the head...everything.

Gave me quite a shiver.

I'm pretty sure utility cardigan means you can do anything in it - farm, beat your children, drink yourself insensible, cheat on your wife, lose your mind. With that expression it sure isn't anything happy.

Did you notice he has a shotgun? Yeah. Hubby pointed that out.

I'm a little nervous now. There's another guy, the "Commuter Scarf and Glove" guy that's got him pretty freaked also.

Boys just aren't brave enough for pattern books.
Hey if I ever get these few hundred thousand pounds dropped, get an up-do and put on some raccoon makeup... will you knit me a sweater so I can be a hot chick too?

PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAASE. I'd let you do me. And I DON'T have small titties.
Who could resist an offer like that? Of course I'd make you a sweater.
Woohoooooo! Well then, I'll keep that in mind and hopefully be requesting said sweater in a year or so. LOL. hoorah!
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