Monday, August 23, 2004

 

Dollar Sto' Ho'


Her Surreal Highness and I paid a visit to the Dollar Store today. MAN, I love that place, as does she. It's a good place to satisfy her four-year-old rabid consumerism and, of course, my perverse desire to buy cheap plastic women in tacky clothing.

Today, we were fortunate in our purchases and managed to come home with Bendy Betty



And Crack Ho' Jo



This happy family was made complete by the addition of Tiny Tammy Tasteless



who was so tightly secured to her odd baby-bottle-shaped sarcophagus that it took my husband five full minutes to free her. There was some sort of wire garrotte around her neck -- it was just all too ugly.

Bendy Betty, for those who are far more kink than I, has the added attraction of losing her right leg on a regular basis. Her Highness has designated this doll to be "mommy" and sends her off "camping on her own" at the beginning of every scenario. I guess she's not really impressed with 3/4 of a doll. Hey, what can you expect for a buck? At least her head stays on.

Life is good.

Speaking of creatures with fewer than the average number of legs, my kitty friend Chavo has lost his leg as well as his tail, but he's doing well and being peculiar, hopping about, eating cheese and sleeping in the bathtub. Thanks to everyone who sent their good thoughts in his direction. He's gonna be just fine, albeit no longer a candidate for the Olympics.

With reference to the Olympics, I have recently started on a walking/jogging/running campaign in an effort to make my generous ass a little less super-sized. I seem to have overdone it a little (half a mile to a mile and a half every night is overdoing? Shesh!) and I've injured the Achilles' Tendon on my left foot. I've got it in a nifty little tensor brace.



I think this makes me look sort of like those spiffy little gymnasts in the Olympics, all hopping about and stuff. My husband thinks it makes me look like I've taken playing Doctor a little too far.

If anyone finds this hot, please email me right away. Really, I need to hear from you.

Comments:
Great dolls ...

But let's get to the point: About the foot -- Single male seeking marginally injured female for long walks on the beach for fun ... and who knows?

Hm .. okay how about just inane virtual conversation.
 
I do so love the Dollar Store! Kids of *my* kids' generation missed out on a really good thing when all the 5&10s went out of business in favor of the K-Wals of the world. I'm so glad that there's a venue for little people with limited funds to spend their allowance again.

Smell the Evening in Paris. Taste the Tangee!
 
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This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
 
baby-bottle-shaped sarcophagus that it took my husband five full minutes to free her. There was some sort of wire garrotte around her neck"

ROFL. I've never heard the godawful packaging that has evolved explained better.
 
Omigod.

*runs off to look for some ice water to hose self down with*
 
Damn! I miss all the good stuff when I sleep!
 
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