Saturday, July 31, 2004


Housework is Wrong and Evil

I am the third worst housekeeper on the face of the planet. I know the other two and they are VILE, so don't start telling me you're in the running for this contest.

So, my mother in law is arriving tomorrow. The third time I met her, in 1996, I arrived around midnight and found her scrubbing the grout in the bathroom with a toothbrush. She stopped when I arrived and apologized for being such a bad housekeeper.

The thing that bothered me the most was that she was using MY toothbrush.

And so now tomorrow, she is going to arrive to find that a) my furniture is stained beyond all redemption, b) my fridge is growing science experiments and c) I have about 800 loads of laundry that are clean but that need to be put away.

I am hoping that my daughter's excessive cuteness is going to save the day ...

Pray for me, darlings.

Pray, as I type (and you know how hard that is for me)!

And since I can't be # 2, can I be #4? or maybe #2 south of the border?? I'm pretty sure I'm not #1.

Housework sucks!
I dunno, my house is pretty retched. Smells like pee mainly. Not human pee, but dog pee. My male dog loves to mark, and I can't beat his ass cuz he does it while we are gone. The bastard. Anyhoo, I also have a sink full of dishes. Some have been in there for over a week, which has attracted ants. I hate to clean, especially dishes. Bleah. So yeah....I probably rank pretty high on the list heh. I'm so lazy.
You are not alone...lots of us live this way BEG.
Three kids, three dogs (ones a loner I'm dogsitting), rabbit, two budgies who leave feathers and seed everywhere, and assorted mice who sneak in and to top it all off it is excessively humid here in Ontario which makes everything ummm aromatic.
And I avoid housework like the plague because it is way more fun to knit and play with dogs.

I'm sure your little one will save the day...excessive cuteness goes a long way.

Debbie in Ontario

Can you walk across the kitchen floor in your bare feet without sticking?

If you were deathly ill, which would you fear more: a) getting hit on the back of the head with the toilet seat or b) catching something incurable from the toilet seat?

Has the garbage guy ever become ill while loading the contents of your cans into his truck?

Have you forgotten 2 weeks or more in a row to put the garbage out for the garbage guy?


Kitchen floor -- no sticking, maybe a little crunching but I did sweep it a couple of days ago. There is, however, visible dirt. All carpets dirty, white furniture purchased while childless and married to another man, grey/brown and vile. All garbage taken out regularly as we have a Smithrite (a bin ... referred to as a "sniffripe" by my father). Bathrooms are clean-ish. Toilets are spotless. We are, however, knee-deep in laundry, sink is full of dishes and truly, the whole place looks like trailer trash live there. Which they do.
Post a Comment

<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?